“We deserve to know the truth before we die”
In Real Defense of Orphans and Widows
An Introduction to Adoptionized: An Orphan’s Critique of the Evangelical Orphan Movement
Imagine believing for more than thirty years that you were orphaned as an infant and thus needed to be adopted overseas. You truly believed with all your heart and soul that you had no living birth relatives. Why? Because of a typed up paper called a “Certificate of Orphanhood” in your adoption file. As a consequence, the thought to look for a nonexistent blood-family didn’t enter your consciousness.
What if you learned—while middle-aged—that members of your family of birth were alive and even looked for you throughout the years? But because adoption law was written and sanctioned by fallible pro-adoption groups, you are never permitted to meet your blood relatives—none of them—not even once—not even into your elder years. You have no right to know from who your blood DNA belongs.
Imagine being labeled anti-adoption, anti-Christian and anti-God if you decided to look for your birth family. If you demonstrate curiosity, you are now the angry target of the evangelical adoptive community you were sent to. Would you dare speak against the majority? Imagine the culture pointing fingers at you because you are in their eyes, “not a real Christian” because of your opinion. Now that you are an adult, they distrust you but they still love adoption. This has been the path of some of us former orphans.
One piece of paper typed-out by a paid adoption agency staff has the authority to hide from you the existence of your entire bloodline under the rhetoric of the “every child deserves a family” advertising campaign. Since digging into the adoption industry, we have heard numerous complaints from adopted people all over the world. From this, we have learned that agencies are known to routinely sabotage adoptees (the world over) against connecting with family if we so choose. This is a crisis. Most alarming is that the definition of orphan has been expanded in adoption law to include children of single or poor parents. This manipulation means that any child is at risk of being exported into the child market. …And they have!
If adoption was not a multi-billion dollar industry, we might not feel the need to point out concerns. Luckily, because of social media, millions of adopted people can network, compare stories, and disapprove—at last. …And we have!
If you are adopted, you have rights. Children should not be used as commodities. The Evangelical Orphan Movement ignores our human rights: rights that are enshrined in the United Nations and even in the U.S. Constitution, rights that are innate for every human. Those who profit from the industry adoptioneers routinely ignore these rights.
Even though adopted people have been given a life that can be seemingly perfect on the surface, we are very perceptive. We don’t buy into bullshit. We can see below the surface of things. We can see the naked emperor. We can intuit when something isn’t right. We’ve been taught to blame ourselves, to smile, to stay positive, but no more. We are adults now. Some of us are middle-aged. Many of us are into our elder years. We deserve to know the truth before we die.
When we stand up for ourselves, we stand up for all of us. When we stand up for all of us, we stand up for our true self.
In defense of orphans and widows, will you help us?