How Do You Cope With Expected Gratitude, Gotcha Days, Forever Families, and Adoption Trauma Created by the Adoption Industry?
The Deception That Causes Deep Emotional Wounds
Adoption is often viewed as a benevolent act, but for many adoptees, it can be a source of profound trauma. The concept of adoption trauma stems from the deception and lies that surround adoption. When you discover that the parents you trusted and grew up with are not your biological parents, it can feel like a betrayal. This realization can shatter your sense of security and trust, leading to long-term emotional pain.
The Lies That Cause Pain: Trust and Family Bonds Broken
The lies told surrounding adoption can have devastating effects. When you trust your adoptive parents as your own family, finding out the truth can be a harsh blow. This revelation can lead to feelings of displacement and a sense of being different from those around you. You might start questioning everything you believed about your identity and place in the world.
Feelings of Displacement: The Struggle to Fit In
Adopted people often struggle with feelings of displacement. You may feel different and be treated differently because of your adoption status. This sense of not fully belonging can be isolating and confusing. The loss of your true lineage and the right to know your family history can exacerbate these feelings, making it hard to find your true identity.
Losing Your True Lineage and Cultural Heritage: The Impact on Identity
One of the adopted person’s most significant losses is the loss of their true lineage. The adoption system can prevent you from knowing your biological parents, your personal tribe, and your family history. This loss can create a void, leaving you wondering about your origins and heritage. The knowledge that you have another family out there, whom you may never meet, can be deeply unsettling.
Lifelong Grief: The Frustration of Not Knowing
Grieving the past is complicated when you don’t fully know what you are grieving. The confusion of not knowing your true background can lead to a complex mix of emotions. You might feel sorrow for the life you never knew and frustration at the barriers preventing you from uncovering your past. This typically lasts for the duration of not knowing.
The Expectation of Gratitude: The Double-Edged Sword
Many people assume that adoptees should be grateful for their adoption. However, this perspective can invalidate your feelings of loss and frustration and can feel nauseating. It’s essential to recognize that while you might appreciate the life you were forced into, it doesn’t negate the pain of losing your original identity. Feeling pressured to be grateful can put you on the defensive, impacting your mental health and well-being.
Identity and Human Rights: The Core of Existence
Knowing your identity is a fundamental human right. When this right is taken away through adoption, it can leave you feeling incomplete. Understanding your roots and accessing your family history is crucial for a sense of self. Depriving adoptees of this knowledge is a violation of their human rights and can lead to long-term psychological effects.
Mistrust and Mental Health: The Foundation of Relationships
Trust is the cornerstone of any healthy relationship. When trust is broken, as it often is in cases of adoption deception, it undermines the entire foundation of your relationships. This broken trust can lead to unhealthy dynamics and affect your mental health. Mistrust also causes suspicion and distrust. According to Maslow’s Hierarchy of Needs, trust and security are fundamental. Without them, achieving self-actualization is nearly impossible.
Master Your Adoption: Empowerment Through Knowledge
To navigate these challenges, “Master Adoption” by Rev. Dr. Janine Myung Ja offers a unique and empowering perspective. This book discusses adoptees’ human rights from philosophical, spiritual, and natural law viewpoints. It challenges the man-made laws that have stripped adoptees of their rights and provides tools for reclaiming your authentic power. “Master Adoption” is a revolutionary guide that can help you understand and assert your human rights, making it an essential read for anyone affected by adoption.
Master Adoption: Reclaiming Your Authentic Power
Adoption is a complex and often painful experience, but you don’t have to face it alone. “Master Adoption” by Rev. Dr. Janine Myung Ja offers a path to understanding and empowerment. This book can help you reclaim your identity and build a healthier, more authentic life by addressing the hidden realities of adoption and advocating for adoptees’ human rights.
